What Should I Expect From My Midwife?

7 Aug

A Gentle Guide to the Care, Conversations, and Support You Deserve

When you find out you’re pregnant, one of the first people you’ll likely meet is your midwife — a trained professional whose role is to walk beside you through pregnancy, birth, and the early days of parenthood.

But what exactly does a midwife do? And what should you expect from that relationship?

At Neutral Nest, we believe in calm, empowered pregnancies — and knowing what kind of care you’re entitled to is part of that.

What Is a Midwife?

A midwife is a registered healthcare professional specially trained in pregnancy, childbirth, postnatal care, and newborn wellbeing. They’re there to support both the clinical side of pregnancy and the emotional, physical, and practical parts of your journey.

In the UK, midwifery care is usually provided through the NHS, although private midwives are also available.

What Your Midwife Should Provide

1. Consistent, Compassionate Care

From your booking appointment through to postnatal visits, your midwife is your primary point of contact. They’re there to answer your questions, explain your options, and help you feel seen and supported.

You should expect:

Respectful, non-judgemental care
A listening ear for concerns or questions
Clear explanations about your care plan
Involvement in your own decision-making

If something doesn’t feel right — you're allowed to speak up.

2. Scheduled Appointments and Health Checks

You’ll have a series of regular check-ins throughout pregnancy, including:

Blood pressure checks
Urine samples
Measuring baby’s growth and position
Blood tests and screening options
Mental wellbeing check-ins
Birth planning discussions

These appointments may be in a GP surgery, hospital, or even at home.

3. Information and Choice Around Tests & Screening

Your midwife will talk you through:

Your booking bloods (at around 8–10 weeks)
The combined screening for chromosomal conditions at 12 weeks
Blood group, iron levels, and infections
Whether you want optional tests or scans — always your choice

They’ll also explain what the results mean, and support you through any next steps.

4. Support With Birth Planning

Your midwife should help you explore:

Where you’d like to give birth (home, birth centre, hospital)
Pain relief options
Who you want present
Preferences around interventions or monitoring
How to feel safe and supported during labour

You’ll usually complete a birth preferences document around 34–36 weeks.

5. Postnatal Support

Your midwife remains your go-to person for the first 10–14 days after birth. They’ll:

Check on your recovery
Monitor baby’s feeding, weight, and wellbeing
Support with breastfeeding or bottle-feeding
Assess baby’s heel prick test and jaundice
Offer emotional and mental health support

After this period, your care is handed over to a health visitor — but your midwife will refer you to extra support if needed.

What You’re Entitled to

As part of standard NHS care, you have the right to:

Be treated with dignity and respect
Ask questions and make informed choices
Say no to any procedure or test
Request continuity of care where possible
Change midwives if something doesn’t feel right

Your voice matters. If you ever feel unheard or dismissed, you can request a different midwife or speak to the head of midwifery at your hospital or trust.

What Your Midwife Isn’t

While midwives are highly trained, they’re not counsellors, doulas, or 24/7 on-call support — unless you’re under a specific home birth or continuity care team.

But they should be:

Kind
Honest
Empowering
Reliable

And if they’re not? You deserve better — and it’s okay to advocate for yourself.

Final Thoughts

Your midwife is there to walk with you — not to direct you. Their job is to guide, explain, support, and offer care that centres you.

Every pregnancy is different, and so is every midwife relationship. But at the heart of it all, you should feel respected, informed, and never alone.

At Neutral Nest, we’re here to help you prepare for pregnancy with clarity, compassion, and confidence — because you deserve to feel calm and held every step of the way.

Grace Carter